You know what makes me sad?
Watching someone pursue a new and healthier lifestyle actually avoid life while doing so, from fear of losing control. This breaks my heart because I was once that person. I would feel guilty if I did anything that was ‘going against’ my health and physique goals.
Even when I would eat out (rarely) and choose the healthier option, I still felt uneasy – knowing that I could only estimate to an extent the caloric content of what I was eating.
I didn’t like going to social gatherings that supplied food, and would avoid them at all costs.
Weekends were spent getting adequate sleep and preparing for the week ahead, because of course having fun means you’re not making progress toward your goals (so stupid).
After work even if I wasn’t tired, I would go home to make sure I was extra prepared for the following day, or because I needed to get ahead at work, or because I should not have so much fun (it was a Tuesday after all).
I would say no to trips, vacations, and sporadic events with my close friends and family – obviously they had no priorities! How would I miss 2 days at the gym and leave without having prepared to my fullest extent?!
I would say no to dates with guys I would have loved to get to know, they couldn’t understand my way of life and how dedicated I was anyway.
I avoided going shopping, because why would I buy new clothes that fit me well if they wouldn’t in a couple of months?! What a waste of money.
Wow, as I go through and reread this, I have no clue how I didn’t realize how utterly insane my thinking was at that point in time. But the sad thing is, this is SO common. In fact it’s more common than not when someone has a big goal and feels the need to be exceptional.
There is nothing wrong with doing your best toward a big goal, but there is something wrong with constantly avoiding every other aspect of life besides those that you can control.
I think the shift in my thinking happened for me about 2 years ago, when I realized that oh I don’t know….
I HAD TO EAT AND WORKOUT FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
LOL what a concept!!
It took a lot of soul searching and self-work to realize that I was using my nutrition and exercise as a shield to keep myself safe from the outside world. I felt that there was no way I could find a balance between work and play.
I had been all play at one point and sabotaged my life, so I went straight to all work thinking it would ‘fix’ everything.
This is why I emphasize balance SO much to my clients and friends, I see no life in living in black and white. To give up precious family memories, friendships, love, LIFE, in the name of fitness?! No thank you but that is not the kind of life I want to live. I would rather venture the ‘unknown’ territory of balance and make some mistakes along the way.
Over the last two years, it’s taken a great deal of self-work to overcome these limiting beliefs I’d held for so long. It is not until the last half a year that I can honestly say I can do these things without anxiety. I have built so much trust in myself and have such a clear understanding of my identity, that I actually feel empowered in these situations. I know I will make choices that reflect what I want/my goals and that make me feel good!
So how do you do this?
You write down the situations that you are avoiding
You think of how often they occur and where
YOU ENTER THEM AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE
Seriously, it’s that simple. Of course you’ll mess-up, disappoint yourself, and be discouraged, but you’ll come out on the other side. And the other side is where you get to really really live, without guilt, without hesitation, and in love.
If this is all new to you and you have questions, you’re in luck! Our first of many group training programs opens for enrollment on April 15th. Check it out here and leave us your email if you’re interested!! (If you already receive emails from us, this is different so you’d have to sign up on this page).
